|
|
| |
The True Meaning of Christmas
Jamie came in and threw her jacket over the back of the closest chair. The only lights on were the bright colors on the Christmas tree. She shook her head and dropped onto the couch. What was Christmas supposed to be about anyway? From here all she could see was people running like lunatics getting presents that no one wants for people they only saw once a year. Was this all there was?
Jamie sighed and kicked her shoes off. She wasn’t doing it, not again. This Christmas she was going to do the minimum that she had to and that was all there was to it. There wasn’t anything in particular that had burnt her out for the season. It could have been the stores decorating the day after Halloween. Or it could have been the hour she had spent looking for a parking space at the mall. Or it could have been the Christmas Carols that attacked from all the radio stations. It could have even been the mob of people that crowded in for the same exact item at once and were not willing to wait for one second. Whatever it was exactly, couldn’t be pinpointed, but the feeling was there and had grown too large to ignore.
She peeled herself off the couch and ceremoniously pulled the plug on the lights on the tree. She sighed again and let her shoulders slump down as the lights blinked off and she stood there in the dark. She left her shoes and jacket where they were and climbed the stairs to her room slowly. As she drifted off to sleep, she wished one last time that she would be excited about the true meaning of Christmas once again.
The early morning light was no where to be seen when her alarm went off the next morning. If her mood had changed, it had gotten worse and there was no way her day was going to be any better. Slapping the snooze button, she threw the covers over her head. Her eyes flew open as the clock stated that she was 30 minutes late getting up. She hurriedly got ready and grabbed a bottle of juice on her way out the door.
She spilt the juice down her front trying to stop a little late at the red light a mile from work. She groaned and tried to clean up the mess as best she could with the Kleenex that had been in her floorboard since time began. It could only get better, she thought and pulled into a parking space. Of course, it didn’t. Her boss was waiting to ‘talk’ to her as she walked in the door and it was not good news. As she left the staff meeting, she dropped her purse and the contents went flying across the room. The small event almost sent her crying after the day she had and a quick look at her watch proved that the day was not nearly over yet.
As Jamie finally made it to her desk, her phone started ringing. She looked at the calendar as she picked up the receiver. Just ten more days and it would all be over for another year. The woman on the phone was from her church. She was wondering if Jamie could help with the food drive that weekend. Jamie shook her head and said yes. So much for doing the minimum. Whatever she said, the woman always had the knack of getting her to say yes eventually, so she might as well give in now.
Shortly before she got ready to face the droves of people outside, a memo came across her desk about the Christmas party that she had signed up to help with for the children of the employees from a few different companies in the area. She sighed yet again. When was it going to end?
As she walked out of the grocery store, her hands weighed down by too many bags, a man bumped into her. She was left holding one full bag and one empty one, the rest and their contents spilled onto the pavement and out into the traffic of oncoming cars. She quickly grabbed at the rolling groceries as the man came back to help her gather her belongings.
"I’m so sorry," he said. "I didn’t mean to bump into you." He smiled, his face lighting up as he watched her fight to keep the bags balanced on her arm. She scowled at his smile and stomped off, leaving him standing in front of the store alone.
Jamie threw the bags of groceries onto her counter and ran back to kick the door closed as she jerked off her coat. Still a little upset from having to chase down her food across the parking lot she flopped back on the couch and turned on the TV. All that was on were Christmas specials so she quickly put a movie on and fell asleep in front of it.
After tossing and turning most of the night, Jamie finally sat up, wide-eyed and looked at the clock. 4:13 AM it read. She rolled her eyes and leaned back onto the couch. Her shoulders slumped down as she relaxed into another fitful asleep.
The next day was not much better. Jamie finally made it through work only to realize that she had left the food she was supposed to bring to the drive that evening sitting on the counter that morning. She sped back to her house through the after-work traffic. She fumed as she waited at one light for 30 minutes and continually looked at the clock and then her watch, wishing time to slow down or the traffic to speed up. As she finally pulled into the parking lot at the church and got out of the car, she twisted her ankle. She gritted her teeth as she hurried into the fellowship hall, carrying the bags.
As she organized the incoming food, sending different people to the tables set up around the room, she had the chance to speak to many people she had not seen in a while. She kept one eye on her watch as she talked with old and new friends about what was going on in their lives. A few thanked her for doing the things through out the year that had helped them and their families. She smiled and inwardly wished that they would move along to another table. At the end of the day she jumped in her car and went directly to bed.
By the time the party at work rolled around, Jamie was so tired of Christmas she couldn’t see straight. Her life had always been too hectic, but this was ridiculous. She closed her tired eyes as the kids came pouring into the room. The noise was deafening, but happy, just as one would expect at a party just three short days before Christmas. She took a deep breath and pasted a fake smile on her face.
After the treats had been eaten, the songs had been sung and all the games had been played, there was only one thing left to do. Santa came down the steps and into the room of cheering children. He read them a story, the same one that was read every year, and then took every last child onto his knee. He asked them to tell him what they wanted most for Christmas and Jamie handed them a gift as they ran to tell their parents what happened. She was tending to her shin that had been kicked at least four times so she didn’t see the tears that welled up in the little girl’s eyes as they fell upon the first doll that she had ever had. The girl hugged Jamie’s leg fiercely and then ran out of the room and jumped into the car that was waiting for her with her grandmother inside. Confused Jamie just handed out the rest of the presents and forgot about the little girl as she carefully put sweat pants over her bruised leg and fell asleep.
On Christmas Eve, she awoke to find her heat off and that her nose was frozen. She pulled the blanket off her bed with her as she went downstairs to find the number to have someone come fix her heat. She finally gave up around noon and bundled up in front of the TV with a bowl of popcorn to enjoy her day off. She had already made her excuses to her family, far away and no one was expecting to see her for a day or two. She was finally alone and that was the way she liked it.
She heated her bowl of soup for one and just as she was sitting down to eat it, the phone rang. It was her pastor to say that the person who was going to say the prayer that night at the mid-night service had come down with a slight cold and asked if someone else might be able to do it. She reluctantly agreed after much prodding and settled back before she got ready to go out into the wind.
It seemed almost impossible to her that it could be much colder outside but as she stepped out the door she realized that not only could it, it was. She started her car and shivered until the heat got it fairly warm in the small space. It was the first time on a while that she had felt that warmth and she touched her nose as it tingled. She pulled up at the church just moments before the service was to start and entered the semi-dark sanctuary.
Jamie pulled off her jacket as the warm air hit her face and sat down closer to the front than she would have liked, by herself. The cantata was wonderful, ending with the traditional live nativity scene, children playing all of the people portrayed. The children were as cute as ever and the halo o light that surrounded them all was breath taking. Jamie looked at her watch one last time. It was time to go soon, they needed to hurry.
As she lifted her head, something unusual caught her eye. The doll that represented the Baby Jesus’ hand was lifted out of the small cradle, gripping the air. That in itself was not an unusual image, but the hand itself was. She looked at it harder and if you had asked, she would have told you that she really could see a nail mark in that tiny hand. Her eyes grew wide at the thought and as every one filed out of the church, she remained in her seat. Finally at the altar, she fell to her knees and the tears flowed down her face as she thought of all the things that had happened this holiday season. And finally, she knew the true meaning of Christmas.